Want to be KID again?

Hi there Beautiful souls <3

I have been wanting to share with you all some inner thoughts that have been going on for a while, more like an appreciation phase in my life. As I sit on this bus leaving Monticello, New York going back to the chaos of the city; I realize that Multi-task and commitment are big thangs in the world of an adult. Yup it got a lot more realer.

Theres a beauty in being an artist. Although so many people perceive the industry and everyone that is not known as a "starving artist," I have changed my views on that false advertisement. See the thing is that people only say they are a starving artist because they live pay check by pay check. I'm not going to sit here and lie, it's still happening to me from time to time. But I have never in my life decided to be an artist because I wanted to starve and not have money. Lets face it, money is important and it is a factor to success. But in order to even get there, you have to have some perspective. 

I love to multi-task and I love kids. So what do I do with these passions? I use it as another source to create some sort of income to support my career. Extending yourself to other jobs that you know you are good at and can excel is probably the best thing, that anyone can offer. That way, you create your schedule, the way you know it needs to be and you do not have to worry about just having one job supplying your survival needs and become stressed while you enter the audition room (if you are an actress/actor/singer). But it really goes for any career, you do better when you know your not going in for the job, just for the money *FACTS* aka.. collected information from my sources; people already in the industry that are working.

Somehow this post got way off the topic I intended to talk about HA! Which is about, IMAGINATION. As an actress that constantly has to tap into the beautiful world of my imagination -crossing to a reality, I really really believe that as we grow older we tend to lose that spark. That flame that drove our parents crazy as children, playing with our toys, pretending that we are in the ocean, driving in a car (but its really a box); those kind of moments that we can only replay in our heads and keep to ourselves....or to our close friends.

Just close your eyes for a second and forget the bills, forget the problems, because honestly its all temporarily, and things will get better. They always do. Be a kid again. Theres nothing wrong with that. I mean honestly we all have a kid in us somewhere, we all were kids once right?! Thats the one thing we all have in common as human beings. 

Plan ahead of time and get in the comfort of being free..NO JUDGEMENT ZONE. Since that really gets us nowhere. 

Thats one thing I am definitely appreciative of. Being able to babysit, tutor, connect with kids of all ages. They need someone, besides their parents to penetrate their mind. As a sitter I have the opportunity to shape and guide the child to an extent and that in itself is a gift  because they are the future. Getting kind of emotional here because all my kids that I babysat when I was kid (I know kind of confusing) are all going to college! I can't even believe it, but I make sure that I check in on them. Its the least I can do. ITS FREE. Helping in itself is a free thing to do, it costs nothing but a little of your time. So make time for being a kid.

So much peace and love going your way.

Albamarina N.

Forgiveness is Hard Enough, but is it?

I have been doing a lot of reminiscing and thinking back to situations when I was younger that use to make me mad. No matter what the situation is, I know now we have no control over what and how people react and do things.  Because at the end of any situation in life we always have a choice.

Yes, i said it. A CHOICE. A move we can make.

I am an analyzer, and also a libra lol. So before I make any move I really have to think about situations.

But this isn't about me.  It's more about forgiving yourself after an argument or something you did that hurt another person.

You must be thinking, "Forgiving yourself? Alba don't you mean forgiving the other person that made you upset?"

Well yes, you have to (or choose to) forgive them, but before you forgive them, you MUST really forgive yourself. How can forgiving yourself help you?

Lets first start with letting that tension go.  Getting angry takes away more energy than being happy. Its a fact.  So while your upset about a situation that you can't really control or if its not going the way you planned, you are already wasting your energy mad about it then really trying to solve it or let it go in its own direction.

May sound a little confusing, but observe another fight or situation you or someone else may be in, and you will see! I promise.

I am going to share with you a VERY personal story, that made me feel mad, upset, angry, pissed, sad, ... EVERYTHING.

I was a senior in high school, and graduation was coming up. In about 4-5 days. My class and I were going on senior trips, excited for the big day. That Wednesday our class was going paint balling. While everyone was outside getting their cars ready, some one told me my principal was looking for me. I got called into the principals office to face the worst news of my life (at that moment).

*Mind you,  during my college application phase earlier that year, I literally kept receiving rejection after rejection. No acceptances, but 2 out of my list. I was frustrated and depressed. Seeing all my friends get acceptances while I was getting rejected was probably the hardest. Going to a College Prep school wasn't helping the situation in any way.  I ended up getting a full scholarship to do a gap year in Brazil (which was my life saver at such a down peak). *Happy dance*

But back to the story. My principal told me I wouldn't be graduating with my class (which was 2 days BEFORE graduadtion).  Because of an end of the year research paper in which I failed by TWO points. (I never failed a class in my whole middle-high school life)... I broke down, I pleaded to just walk on the aisle with an empty diploma and make up my paper.

She didn't budge. What I wanted most in my life at the time was my dad to see me cross the stage. He moved to Florida when I was 11 and he was traveling to my hometown, Boston for my graduation. I kid you not, that is all I wanted, to hear the words "I am proud."

I committed to my middle and high school so much; throughout my passion of clubs and any leadership roles I can grasp. And I never failed a class before! Never would I have thought I wouldn't have walked with my class.

The point? Well after that situation, I HATED every teacher in my school that existed. I felt like they looked down on me because:

 a) I wasn't going straight into college
 b) I didn't graduate with my class

I felt like everyone was against me. My parents didn't understand, my family was not really supportive of me going off for a year out of the country. It felt like everything was just going down hill.

But once I left the U.S, I realized I still held a lot of that hate within me. And I kid you not I felt it in my chest like a big ball wanting to just explode. And thats exactly what I did.  I talked about the situation with my friends abroad and just cried. I yelled, I swam in the water to let all that held in energy completely go...FREE. But what really helped me was writing.

I chose to forgive myself, and remind myself that I did nothing wrong. That I am valuable and I am unique. Remind myself, that my path may be the one I hadn't planned, but it sure was going to make me happy no matter what problem came across.

Then little by little I began to forgive everyone else. Not like I told them "I forgive you".  But in my sanctuary place. Where only I knew.  I had truly forgave them and did not keep ahold of any sort of grudge. Didn't happen over night, but over months.

There is always an outlet. You just have to find your own outlet, the one that truly frees you from any sort of negative energy that YOU do not really need in your life to truly be happy.

The challenge is to be aware and consistent with forgiveness. There is always a challenge you can over come.


Peace&Love,

Alba

10 things you can do before sunrise

Many of us complain that we never have enough time in the day to do the things we want. It is very false. We have 24 hours every day to accomplish all that we desire. The difference about 'making time' is you have to sacrifice something to make little changes become stronger.

E.g- If you want to get in shape and work a 9-5 job, knowing you usually are exhausted after work.. maybe you should wake up earlier and work out for at least 15-30 minutes daily. Think about it, these little 15-30 minutes daily can actually impact your body and health by being consistent and pushing yourself just a little bit. It can guide you to a better you.

Here is a list of 10 things me and my sis came up with to do before sunrise. There is no particular order. (And if you don't know when your sunrise is, check the weather guide the day before to plan ahead!)

FYI you can do more than 1 of these things, 5-10 minutes banging out at least three is a good start. No pressure at all, go at your pace, but if you want a change you must start small first.

1) Meditate, some people think you have to meditate for a long period of time, in actuality you can meditate for however long you want. Just be in the moment.
2) Write your thoughts or gratitude in your journal (if you don't have one, get one! Observing where your thoughts are every day can help you turn more to the positive side.)
3) Make a toDAY-do list
4) Read, an interesting book, a new series, anything that interests you and will inspire you to be an awesome YOU!
5) Work out
6) Make breakfast
7) Paint, sketch, doodle anything creative that comes to your finger tips! Adults can be kids too.
8) Take a yoga class (@ Yoga to the people for my New York & Cali people! Check out their site for more info)
9) Reach out to a loved one via email, text, phone and tell them you appreciate them in your life, let them know they are not alone, and wish them a beautiful blessed day.
10) Prepare your meal for the day. Wanting to save money but find yourself not having enough time to make your lunch the day before, do it the morning!

Winter.. is it over?

Hey guys,

Lately the weather has been acting crazy.. wait a minute actually its been acting crazy for along time. But there is this one thing that really bothers me and I just don't understand it at all.

I understand with fashion week and how they are always ahead of the seasons and all. (actually thats a lie lol, I have no freaking idea).

But retail stores piss me off! After the whole 'Holiday sales' Bullsh*, not even a month after January, all the retail stores post up Winter Clearance and Sale signs?!

Do they not realize that it is still under 30 degrees outside and winter is not literally over?!

Winter it is actually over on March 19th..and even then it is still cold! To be technical here.

I DO NOT UNDERSTAND. 

In America, all the commercial life is all about living in the future. Seriously. We adapt so easily to it, that we do not even notice it surrounding us. We become like zombies, brainwashed and dead to the reality. How can we always plan for the future if we do not find a solution for the present issues in our country that are caused from the past? What sense does that make.. Really.

Americans crave buying and selling. Thats just a fact, to its own people or not. Consuming is an addiction. An addiction that causes trouble. Then people wonder why they are in so much debt? More than two credit cards, buying at least one unneeded item once a day… even coffee.

Now a days holidays have no real sentimental; because our youngest generation- already ask or have the technology that was just released by big companies. Growing up, wanting what every other kid has can be tuff,  and understandable. But parents should not forget to teach their kids value and appreciation. But thats another post…

On the bright side, s good thing from those early clearances are for us people in the cold area, to find cheaper sweaters that were overly priced and still keep cozy!

Be a smart shopper :)

Peace&Love,
Alba

Was stuck..BUT FREE 2014

Hey Guys,

It has been such a long time since I have logged on and wrote a blog and I definitely have missed it. Terribly!

The thing is, being completely honest. Being an artist is just plain hard. Not to say that it is so difficult that it isn't possible but to the point where you can get lost, stuck, muted, and really confused. Just like in any other career, but as a actress/painter/writer WHATEVER IT IS;  being muted is NO BUENO. So many ideas run through my head constantly, that I wish there was a cord plugged into my head and wrote and recorded everything so I can grasp every awesome idea/dream I have ever had. (My sister laughs at me when I tell her this!)

But it's not like that. Not at all, and I swear the best ideas come to you at the most random times and places. It's something I have to work on. Like jotting them down on my notes on my iPhone haaha ( I have so many notes is ridiculous!) and actually writing them on here. So get excited because I am going to be writing more frequently and will update my you tube channel.. stay tuned!mwuaha!

Being blocked (not purposely of course) is just aggravating, because your potential and dedication is there, just not 100% available for you to reach and just LET GO! AND BE FREE!

It is like a singer who has sang all her life to herself and family members and then believes she grew out of it because she got older. So she looks for another career to fulfill her happiness, but can't seem to find one that makes her as happy as when she used to sing just for fun. UNLOCK YOUR HAPPINESS

When the idea of fear enters the mind…..it changes everything. SO THEY SAY! … B.S

But does it really? Physically? Of course not, yet why do we still act as if fear was a Big wheeled truck ready to crush us? If we were to tell it "NO I DONT FEAR YOU FEAR!" what could it possibly do to us? NOT A DAMN THANG!

The truth is we control fear. It does not just appear out of no where. It comes from within us, in our minds. We thought about it, and we told ourselves that we are afraid of whatever it is. And then act on not CONCURRING OUR FEAR. (our just beating the crap our of ha!)

See, it really is easy to step on fear and tell it to disappear. Everyone talks about YOLO (You only live once). But why would you want to live the rest of your life in fear? What fun is that? Live your life to the fullest right?

And what if you don't have that opportunity knocking on your door again? And as soon as you said no, your immediate instincts smacked you secretly and just told you how dumb that decision was. What if that was the perfect time for your path to impress you and show you your real potential that you had no idea was in you?

You will live to regret that moment, then later forgive yourself and continue searching for your happiness in your path. Living every moment.

What I am trying to say is, ignore what others say about your decisions. Acknowledge your negative thoughts, and prove them wrong by creating positive outcomes that truly make you happy. Making others happy will not always fulfill your happiness and that is a fact. Because "you only live once"

YOU ALWAYS COME FIRST.

Sound selfish? eh, not really. We come into the world alone, we leave alone and what matters is our journey here, right now in this very moment.

It's time to be a little selfish for once and do what you want. Nothing is impossible. EVERYTHING is possible. Believe in yourself and give yourself credit, because you are important in this world. There is only one of you EVER.

Stop living in the past and in the future. Live in this very moment and conquer your happiness and love.

And your path will roll out, right in front of you without you noticing that it was destiny all along.

Peace&love,

Alba

Do you stop and think that your alone?

Hey Guys!

Lately I have been so busy doing so many things it feels like I never have time for myself.  But when I stop and think for one second and realize I am not alone, I can't help but smile.  Because people usually feel alone when their doing their thing in terms of working or "grinding" and focusing on them. Hey I am not going to lie, sometimes I do! What I really want to talk about is the value of friendship.

How beautiful it is to be YOURSELF 100% of the time around someone that knows you so well and loves, supports you all the way.

I was never really a only child, I mean I was for a while, but my father had four other kids before me with my stepmom and I was always surrounded by my older sisters when I would visit them in New York.  I always lived in Boston, but I was my mom's first child.  Growing up was not as hard as I would have thought (I also had step brothers and sisters) So I was always surrounded by many people and of course my cousins. I only had one- three people that really knew me. We were close and shared everything with each other.  But as we grow up our imagination gets smaller and we tend to throw away a lot of what we think about because our focus is on other things.

Friendship is something so beautiful that everyone encounters in sometime in their life. There are bad moments and sad moments but when you see the progress youre friendship/ relationship has made in just 5 years; you realize how much you care for one another. Also how much you both have grown as an individual and as a team.

Moving away from my small hometown to the loud, fast pace New York City has shown me that friendships are always going to present themselves no matter where and what state of mind I am in. (Even though you can get lost in NYC) The hard part is always showing appreciation frequently and letting the other person know how much you truly care for them.

But in all relationships come hardships, what matters at the end of the day is that you participate in the relationship, because thats what its really about. Working together as a team! 50/50! And always being their no matter the distance!

Whats one thing you do to keep you're friendships strong?

Peace&love,
Alba

Are you always Angry?

Hey guys!

Anger being a waste of energy? Does anger make things worse? Maybe once or just all the time?

Honestly this is such a iffy topic to talk about because when you feel angry most of the time you dont really think about the consequences that come after.  For example your brother uses one of your favorite shirts you just bought, you haven't even worn it yet and he wears it to school! So your pissed at the moment and you curse him out and tell him you hate having a brother and wish you never had one, just saying the nastiest things. After a while your blood is still boiling and things can go many different ways. But either at this point you yare feeling so ... overly charged with so much energy you don't even know where to even put or leave it. So you punch a wall or scream in your pillow and feel a little bit better.  But what if your brother knows you didn't mean those things and later on really contemplates on it.  Being "emotional" about it (as everyone says) or he let the words get to him.  Now what? You apologize or maybe just try to brush it off like it never happened. But that energy is still there, within both of you. Sometimes we don't have the power to even control that.. or do we? What about for the people that can't really control how angry they get; where they can not think for a second right before they get angry and think to themselves " hmmmp, I am about to angry and I don't really care for what anyone even thinks."  That never happens. Emotions just happen no matter how much we try to hold back, and pretend they are not there.

Anger is so powerful that no one can ever catch it before it slips out. What is the real definition of anger? or being angry?


Anger is a normal emotion with a wide range of intensity, from mild irritation and frustration to rage. It is a reaction to a perceived threat to ourselves, our loved ones, our property, our self-image, or some part of our identity. Anger is a warning bell that tells us that something is wrong.

Definition from: http://www.pbs.org/thisemotionallife/topic/anger/what-anger

Some say it can be healthy or it could be opposite.  Honestly my opinion of being angry: it is not worth wasting negative energy when that can be put into positive energy that can benefit you!! (But again being angry happens to everyone!) Emotions is another topic.. but do we seek emotions to feel more comfortable?

Being conscious is one thing, but taking action and trying new ways to become less angry takes practice. Whats one way you try to not get so upset?

Peace&love,
Alba

3 ways to not "cheat"!

Hey Guys,

Lately I have been thinking about my "cheating days". Because I have been having so many :( But hey at least I am aware of it .. right? Temptation is always knocking on the door in anything that we want to change for the better. I have learned that in order to completely change my whole entire way of eating I have to take baby steps. That is extremely hard for me because I like to pull extreme makeovers in my life! But the reality of going from not so healthy to having a healthy lifestyle will be the real challenge.

So my top 3 ways to not have Cheating days! (Just have one for the week?)

1) LEAVE YOUR ATM CARD OR CREDIT CARD AT HOME.

I know this is probably the hardest one for me because I bring my debit card with me for emergency reasons but its worth a try!

2) BRING SNACKS WITH YOU SO YOU WON'T BE TEMPTED.

If you are always on the go, taking trains and buses and find yourself being surrounded by all the fast food resturants etc, bring your own healthy snack! Bagged up fruit, any type of nuts, homemade treats that you know will knock your hunger while you are out and bout.

3)  PREVENT FEELING.

I am not sure if everyone feels a certain way after eating out (McDonalds, Popeyes, etc) But I do, its more or so the type of feeling like "uh I am so full and feel so fat and bloated like I can't breathe, but while I was eating the fries it was tasting so right but now.. I wish I didn't even purchase it" So if you know the end result before hand, remember you don't want that feeling so prevent it.

Bonus: Have one TREAT DAY and enjoy your favorite thing! I am addicted to chocolate : kit cats, m&m's anything that is milk chocolate I adore. But I have slowly been dipping my way into dark chocolate since it is better for you.  It is a bit bitter but still kills my craving for "milk chocolate". 

Have more way of not "cheating" Comment and share!

Remember trying is key!

peace&love,

Alba

A little twist is all you need

Hey dolls!

Holy cow can I just say I feel like a kid getting reading glasses for the first time, relieved! 

So I signed up for a free acting workshop about three weeks ago. Apparently the workshop was today and I was rushing to get to the workshop, (hey it was free!) I wa super excited even invited my homegirl but she already had plans :( . So I am looking for the workshop in the building full of tons of other studios and asking everyone in the elevator if they where there for the workshop too; but everyone gave me a face. Not a mean face but a " i don't know what you are talking about, I am in a rush to my class, hope you find wherever your going" face. You know what I mean? 

I get to the 4th floor because security said it was there, and it's a dead space. On my left I see people giving hugs to eachother and I am like ; hey I don't know you guys and it feels like I am lost :'(. 

I ask a girl on her laptop if she know where the workshop was and she's like "ummm.." And on my right there is  a teacher trying to open her studio room fidgeting with her keys. She turns around and asks me, " what are you looking for?" And I tell her the whole story and she tells me it's on the 5th floor and to have fun! 

So here I am on the elevator trying to hurry up and get to the workshop. I get to the fifth floor and everything is empty, well the hallways are. But I hear classes going on. I see one studio door opened and I am thinking, how very welcoming (thinking this is the studio for the free workshop). I walk into the room to find a guy with his legs up on a chair, chomping  on ice, typing on his laptop. I ask him if this was for the workshop and he's like that studio is not in this building. I am freaking out thinking it was a scam (beware!) 

But it turns out he was a teacher and the owner of the acting school we were standing in. He was explaining to me how the school came about. And I really was agreeing with many facts and scenarios he was bringing up. He even showed me a small clip of how the school came about. He explained to me that acting is not to act or learn how to act. He said it is about really living your life in any situation. That usually actors are told to do an action or to feel from a similar situation and most of them get stuck and hit a wall; beause they are not really feeling what they REALLY feel at that very moment. (Sounds like meisner, but totaly different). He kept going into detail about what I should be looking for within training: I should be looking for professional training and trying to master being free. He wasn't trying to sell his school so much but he was really feeding me this interesting knowledge that I have thought about but was very unclear.

THIS WAS CRAZY, because it felt like it was what I needed, he laid the clarity that I really needed to hear! (Since it was very fuzzy in my cute brain) ha!

Let me tell you, I came out of tht studio feeling a little brand new, (strange must I say!) as if my perspective was changed, as if a big weight was taken off my shoulder. I felt amazing! (Of course I took his card!) but what does this even mean? 

I guess I gotta figure this out for the next part that connects to this puzzle piece!

Who would of thought a city so busy could give you clarity?

Peace&love,

Alba