The update & the 411

Hi You!!

It's been a bajillion years already, and I have missed you dearly. There is this thing called life that loves to test everything and everything that you are made of..so if you let it get to you, you will only let yourself down! Thats exactly where I've been, in the cloud of depression while cluttering my brain with a thousand more what-ifs, AND what I WANT to do.

Here's my intro video of the Depression stage:

It drove me nuts indeed it really did, but what really killed me was that the simple answer was right in front of me, surrounding me, and was told to me. The plan to ACTION. The hardest part in anything you and everyone else has to do to get to point A and point B.

So, I became inspired by my surroundings and started to change my (oh so not nice thoughts) and wrote down a plan. Ladies and gentlemen, I introduce to you, the 90 Day Goal Challenge.

You may be wondering what in the world is that thing?! Well, I did mention it in the above video, but really worked out the kinks in this one:

Now the real question is, is it really working? And the answer is: It's in progress. The #1 thing that you must do when taking any challenge upon thyself is to Plan ahead of time. What i mean is to really, set out your agenda the day before (in hour blocks) and plan out, each and everything you need to do to get to your big goal.

You have to discipline your self, to do the things you don't want to do, in order to get to the over all goal! Which is a good thing yes indeed, but once you force yourself to do the "hard work" everything that follows become more natural and less forceful. It becomes more of an enjoyment because you remind yourself of that nice big goal up there, waiting for you patiently.

I hope this inspires you to take the challenge and really focus on what you want to do and what you can do with a little bit of specifics, and planning.

Much love,

Albamarina N.

Forgiveness is Hard Enough, but is it?

I have been doing a lot of reminiscing and thinking back to situations when I was younger that use to make me mad. No matter what the situation is, I know now we have no control over what and how people react and do things.  Because at the end of any situation in life we always have a choice.

Yes, i said it. A CHOICE. A move we can make.

I am an analyzer, and also a libra lol. So before I make any move I really have to think about situations.

But this isn't about me.  It's more about forgiving yourself after an argument or something you did that hurt another person.

You must be thinking, "Forgiving yourself? Alba don't you mean forgiving the other person that made you upset?"

Well yes, you have to (or choose to) forgive them, but before you forgive them, you MUST really forgive yourself. How can forgiving yourself help you?

Lets first start with letting that tension go.  Getting angry takes away more energy than being happy. Its a fact.  So while your upset about a situation that you can't really control or if its not going the way you planned, you are already wasting your energy mad about it then really trying to solve it or let it go in its own direction.

May sound a little confusing, but observe another fight or situation you or someone else may be in, and you will see! I promise.

I am going to share with you a VERY personal story, that made me feel mad, upset, angry, pissed, sad, ... EVERYTHING.

I was a senior in high school, and graduation was coming up. In about 4-5 days. My class and I were going on senior trips, excited for the big day. That Wednesday our class was going paint balling. While everyone was outside getting their cars ready, some one told me my principal was looking for me. I got called into the principals office to face the worst news of my life (at that moment).

*Mind you,  during my college application phase earlier that year, I literally kept receiving rejection after rejection. No acceptances, but 2 out of my list. I was frustrated and depressed. Seeing all my friends get acceptances while I was getting rejected was probably the hardest. Going to a College Prep school wasn't helping the situation in any way.  I ended up getting a full scholarship to do a gap year in Brazil (which was my life saver at such a down peak). *Happy dance*

But back to the story. My principal told me I wouldn't be graduating with my class (which was 2 days BEFORE graduadtion).  Because of an end of the year research paper in which I failed by TWO points. (I never failed a class in my whole middle-high school life)... I broke down, I pleaded to just walk on the aisle with an empty diploma and make up my paper.

She didn't budge. What I wanted most in my life at the time was my dad to see me cross the stage. He moved to Florida when I was 11 and he was traveling to my hometown, Boston for my graduation. I kid you not, that is all I wanted, to hear the words "I am proud."

I committed to my middle and high school so much; throughout my passion of clubs and any leadership roles I can grasp. And I never failed a class before! Never would I have thought I wouldn't have walked with my class.

The point? Well after that situation, I HATED every teacher in my school that existed. I felt like they looked down on me because:

 a) I wasn't going straight into college
 b) I didn't graduate with my class

I felt like everyone was against me. My parents didn't understand, my family was not really supportive of me going off for a year out of the country. It felt like everything was just going down hill.

But once I left the U.S, I realized I still held a lot of that hate within me. And I kid you not I felt it in my chest like a big ball wanting to just explode. And thats exactly what I did.  I talked about the situation with my friends abroad and just cried. I yelled, I swam in the water to let all that held in energy completely go...FREE. But what really helped me was writing.

I chose to forgive myself, and remind myself that I did nothing wrong. That I am valuable and I am unique. Remind myself, that my path may be the one I hadn't planned, but it sure was going to make me happy no matter what problem came across.

Then little by little I began to forgive everyone else. Not like I told them "I forgive you".  But in my sanctuary place. Where only I knew.  I had truly forgave them and did not keep ahold of any sort of grudge. Didn't happen over night, but over months.

There is always an outlet. You just have to find your own outlet, the one that truly frees you from any sort of negative energy that YOU do not really need in your life to truly be happy.

The challenge is to be aware and consistent with forgiveness. There is always a challenge you can over come.


Peace&Love,

Alba

Was stuck..BUT FREE 2014

Hey Guys,

It has been such a long time since I have logged on and wrote a blog and I definitely have missed it. Terribly!

The thing is, being completely honest. Being an artist is just plain hard. Not to say that it is so difficult that it isn't possible but to the point where you can get lost, stuck, muted, and really confused. Just like in any other career, but as a actress/painter/writer WHATEVER IT IS;  being muted is NO BUENO. So many ideas run through my head constantly, that I wish there was a cord plugged into my head and wrote and recorded everything so I can grasp every awesome idea/dream I have ever had. (My sister laughs at me when I tell her this!)

But it's not like that. Not at all, and I swear the best ideas come to you at the most random times and places. It's something I have to work on. Like jotting them down on my notes on my iPhone haaha ( I have so many notes is ridiculous!) and actually writing them on here. So get excited because I am going to be writing more frequently and will update my you tube channel.. stay tuned!mwuaha!

Being blocked (not purposely of course) is just aggravating, because your potential and dedication is there, just not 100% available for you to reach and just LET GO! AND BE FREE!

It is like a singer who has sang all her life to herself and family members and then believes she grew out of it because she got older. So she looks for another career to fulfill her happiness, but can't seem to find one that makes her as happy as when she used to sing just for fun. UNLOCK YOUR HAPPINESS

When the idea of fear enters the mind…..it changes everything. SO THEY SAY! … B.S

But does it really? Physically? Of course not, yet why do we still act as if fear was a Big wheeled truck ready to crush us? If we were to tell it "NO I DONT FEAR YOU FEAR!" what could it possibly do to us? NOT A DAMN THANG!

The truth is we control fear. It does not just appear out of no where. It comes from within us, in our minds. We thought about it, and we told ourselves that we are afraid of whatever it is. And then act on not CONCURRING OUR FEAR. (our just beating the crap our of ha!)

See, it really is easy to step on fear and tell it to disappear. Everyone talks about YOLO (You only live once). But why would you want to live the rest of your life in fear? What fun is that? Live your life to the fullest right?

And what if you don't have that opportunity knocking on your door again? And as soon as you said no, your immediate instincts smacked you secretly and just told you how dumb that decision was. What if that was the perfect time for your path to impress you and show you your real potential that you had no idea was in you?

You will live to regret that moment, then later forgive yourself and continue searching for your happiness in your path. Living every moment.

What I am trying to say is, ignore what others say about your decisions. Acknowledge your negative thoughts, and prove them wrong by creating positive outcomes that truly make you happy. Making others happy will not always fulfill your happiness and that is a fact. Because "you only live once"

YOU ALWAYS COME FIRST.

Sound selfish? eh, not really. We come into the world alone, we leave alone and what matters is our journey here, right now in this very moment.

It's time to be a little selfish for once and do what you want. Nothing is impossible. EVERYTHING is possible. Believe in yourself and give yourself credit, because you are important in this world. There is only one of you EVER.

Stop living in the past and in the future. Live in this very moment and conquer your happiness and love.

And your path will roll out, right in front of you without you noticing that it was destiny all along.

Peace&love,

Alba

Owe $, but don't know where to start?

He guys,

Actually owing someone something…hmmmm ? This is a very touchy subject to talk about since we all don't like to borrow. But what frustrates me is when someone does a favor for you and puts it in your face that you "owe" them something. 

.... First, if you didn't want to the favor from the kindness of your heart than why do it all? Seriously. 

Secondly, The consistency of hearing the nagging and bragging on how you owe someone something back is annoying. (For example) What if your at the point where you can't give them the money you borrowed and would love to give it to them but financially can't right now. How to explain it? To your friend, your family, your boss? How can you make them understand where your coming from?

Thirdly, it's about working together. If you feel the person dodging you purposely, you might as well explain how you are feeling about the situation. "Hinting" at owing money makes situations awkward and unclear. Work together not against. 

from: bawldguy.com 

The solution is clear however most of us don't even do it. Hey I for sure "owe" a lot of things and really wish I could unleash myself from "owing back". But I'm figuring out a way.  It starts off with communication, not "bitching" but communicate effectively on your situation, what your willing to do to "pay your owe", how it bothers you when they bring the situation up in front of others when it's really between you and the other person, how it really makes you feel. I know you must be thinking "oh how emotional can this person get" but this is the problem within the human population. We want to hide how we feel, which leads to making situations worse, and how we feel inside even worse. 

It starts off with realizing you have pain within you that is held back, and forgiving yourself, others in order to move forward. Communicate and situations will come out smooth, positive, and effective. What you put into a situation is what you will receive. 

There is always a formula!!!  

Peace&love,

Alba

Don't you want real news?

Hey guys!

Something that has always bothered me is why doesn't the news actually tell us what we really need to know? All these news stations say the same exact thing, trying to move our attention or blind us to the reality of current news.

Like what really happens behind closed doors when the cameras are off?

How this came up to me is because I graduated high school with out knowing a lick about REAL life. I mean loans, stocks, bills, investment plans, health and life insurance,  retirement plans, The real things we actually need to know about in life! You know? 

Thank God my first job was at a financial advisor's office!

Why in the world won't schools teach us the things we need to know. Each teacher will tell you the same B.S. example math teacher : "your going to need to know this when you get in the real world" shut up!!! Half the things I learned in school have not popped up in my life. Hey don't get me wrong I love math, it was my favorite and best class since k-1, but seriously unless I am an accountant I don't need most of that s*€%$ ! 

The real problem is the system not feeding us the right and real information. It's all about controlling the people blahblahblah. It's not fair to us, if we make most of the population on earth why lie to us through media? Well my first answer to my own question would simply be business. Everything is a business. Even marriage.  If we all have to pay for a marriage license, and most of us get divorced ( which is way more $ than the stupid license) , the state will  clearly make more money off of everyone getting divorced.  (Hey these are my opinions and theories lol! ) 

But if you guys disagree or have your own opinions please do share in a comment below!

This all came about bc I always see people on the subway with newspapers of scattered news. 

Peace&love,

Alba

Do you stop and think that your alone?

Hey Guys!

Lately I have been so busy doing so many things it feels like I never have time for myself.  But when I stop and think for one second and realize I am not alone, I can't help but smile.  Because people usually feel alone when their doing their thing in terms of working or "grinding" and focusing on them. Hey I am not going to lie, sometimes I do! What I really want to talk about is the value of friendship.

How beautiful it is to be YOURSELF 100% of the time around someone that knows you so well and loves, supports you all the way.

I was never really a only child, I mean I was for a while, but my father had four other kids before me with my stepmom and I was always surrounded by my older sisters when I would visit them in New York.  I always lived in Boston, but I was my mom's first child.  Growing up was not as hard as I would have thought (I also had step brothers and sisters) So I was always surrounded by many people and of course my cousins. I only had one- three people that really knew me. We were close and shared everything with each other.  But as we grow up our imagination gets smaller and we tend to throw away a lot of what we think about because our focus is on other things.

Friendship is something so beautiful that everyone encounters in sometime in their life. There are bad moments and sad moments but when you see the progress youre friendship/ relationship has made in just 5 years; you realize how much you care for one another. Also how much you both have grown as an individual and as a team.

Moving away from my small hometown to the loud, fast pace New York City has shown me that friendships are always going to present themselves no matter where and what state of mind I am in. (Even though you can get lost in NYC) The hard part is always showing appreciation frequently and letting the other person know how much you truly care for them.

But in all relationships come hardships, what matters at the end of the day is that you participate in the relationship, because thats what its really about. Working together as a team! 50/50! And always being their no matter the distance!

Whats one thing you do to keep you're friendships strong?

Peace&love,
Alba

Want Success? Go and get it..NOW

Hey dolls!

You know the feeing of WANTING to do something, but you just feel so lazy? My favorite Example: you want to watch tv but the remote control is alllll the way on the other side of the room, but you are to comfortable laying there on your sofa. BAM! If only we had a magical wand to do as we command? Yes we all dreamt of it.  Sorry this is not Hogwarts :(  

"We want everything now and we want it without earning it" - Rory Vaden

We all want results, but forget it really takes time, consistency, and dedication. One You Tubber I follow: Spoken Reasons, made the perfect slogan that everyone can apply to their life every day!!

FCHW : faith, consistency, and hard work.  IT MAKES SENSE RIGHT?! Yes indeed it is true. 

You all know Michael Jordan, the best basketball player of all time. But have you tried to figure out HOW IN THE HELL DID HE GET THERE? Did he just wait for someone to scout him or just loved basketball and played well? Ummm sorry to say it did not come to him, he went to it.  Here is a quick 10 must-read Success Lessons from Michael Jordan I found online from his Auto biography.

http://www.mrselfdevelopment.com/2013/02/10-must-read-success-lessons-from-michael-jordan/

But doing things we don't feel like doing is not as hard as we perceive it.  In fact its easier than we think, we just got to do it and start thinking differently.  

"Successful people have all had to do things they didn't feel like doing in order to get where they are" - Rory Vaden

Peace&love, 

Alba 

Stuck in a place unknown?

Hey Guys!

Lately I have been stuck in my thoughts and not able to express myself.  I am not going to lie it is a weird place to be for me.  At one point I felt like I was going to explode with words.  But I haven't :( just yet!

I honestly feel over worked.. but of what? All I have been doing is school and preparing for "the real world". Maybe I am in need of a vacation or maybe I just want the summer to come already , wouldn't that be nice!  But I think right now in my life I am just feeling overwhelmed for the next step.  As most college kids that go to school for an amount of time and graduate.. we often question ourselves about jobs or what going to happen after this.  This is kind of the issue, we are always trying to be ahead f the game or thinking in the future rather than the NOW. 

It is totally normal but with our generation we are so used to getting what we want in seconds.. and this is where we start to panic when we don't get what we expect. How could this be solved or fixed? I have no idea, but what I do know is that we can start to learn from our parents generation.

Ask questions, read, go to the library, or put yourself out there to want to learn.  I was having a conversation with one of my teachers from school and he said that our generation here in the US is known to be the dumbest, compared to other countries. I couldn't bare the truth and of course was beyond offended with his opinion and said you can't categorize everyone into that. All because of the decline in the average human IQ. Supposedly the more the population grows the dumber we get. I don't know how I feel about this but I do know we need to make a change!

What are you're thoughts and opinons?

peace&love,

alba

credit: http://uhaweb.hartford.edu/BRBAKER/